After two years of INVOLUNTARY unemployment.....I have come to the sad realization that there simply are NO JOBS to be had in this country, any longer!! All available jobs are now in Russia, Pakistan, India, Viet Nam, Venezuela, China, Mexico.....oh, and let's don't forget that musical-sounding city, Shangri La!
So....Yes...you heard right! I need you to send me money. I will accept any amount, but the larger the amount, the greater my joy. No, I'm not feeding the world's children or trying to cure cancer. I'm simply trying to survive! Several have already contributed! You don't want to be left out!! Hurry!! Time is running out! The proverbial 'wolf' has nearly succeeded in chewing his way through my door!
For security and safety reasons, I will need to rent a PO Box to accept your donations. 'Course, I don't want to rent one prematurely, you understand, so if you wish to contribute to the 'cause (which is: "cause I need the money!"), please indicate your desire (and amount) in the comment section below this post. Once I have a sufficient number of contributors, I'll go rent that post office box!
I'm mulling over the idea of Pledge Cards.....you know how they work, right? You pledge to provide me with a fixed amount every month....and in exchange, I will pledge to YOU, to happily accept your on-going donations!! Heck, if I get enough of these type of contributors, I can just STOP LOOKING FOR A JOB!! Woo-Hoo!!
Your contributions are probably tax deductible, but I won't be sending out any 1099's or whatever form the IRS requires, so good luck with that aspect of it. Just know that your hard-earned money is going to a worthy cause!! (my survival!) When you break it down, my request is really just in keeping with our 'not-so-brilliant' President's philosopy of taking from the "Haves", and redistributing to the "HaveNots". I have become a HAVE NOT!! (and it only took 2 years!!) I need you HAVES to step up to the plate....willingly; with a smile on your face; and DO YOUR PART in the redistribution of YOUR money! Ok??
In lieu of cash donations, I will consider adoption by a wealthy family....OR.....being named as the sole heir to the fortune of a soon-to-be-deceased person. This person will need to have one foot in the grave, and the other on a banana peel......'cause I can't wait too long. My bills come due every month!
About Me
- Paula Marie Brown-Nelson
- I am a low-maintenance woman & avoid stress whenever possible. I do NOT like drama...or it's Queens! I'm a very likeable person & can fit into most any social group. I know which fork to use at a formal dinner, and I know which beverage goes well with Hot-wings. I detest sports fanatics and will avoid televised sports events whenever humanly possible. I love my kids...but not necessarily YOURS. I have very little tolerance for stupidity, and try to avoid people who are afflicted with this disease. I have no patience for whiners & complainers. IF YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR SITUATION....CHANGE IT! Don't ask me "how"....that lesson is YOURS to learn! The cartoon character "Maxine" is actually ME. Well, OK, not really, but she & I think pretty much the same on most subjects. My real life hero is Erin Brockovich. You'll find that I have a great sense of humor, sharp wit, and extreme sarcasm. If this is your "cup of tea", then you will enjoy my posts. If not, READ SOMETHING ELSE!
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