Remember when you could buy girls/ladies panties that had the days of the week embroidered on them? Monday - Tuesday - Wednesday, etc. They came in a 7 pair pack and each "day" was a different color. I was tempted several times, as a teenager, to buy a package of them. I thought it was rather cool!
FORTY YEARS LATER....I'm glad I never did!!! I've been giving this some serious thought for the past few hours. What if laundry didn't get done on time? Let's say Tuesday rolls around again, but "Tuesday"s panties are still not clean?? Could you possibly wear "Wednesday"s panties on Tuesday? What if you should wear "Friday"s panties on Wednesday?? Or...God forbid...what if you wore "Wednesday"s panties on Friday, and were involved in an accident of some sort?? When you got to the hospital, would they think you'd been wearing the same pair of panties for the past three days???? Worse, still...what if they found a body at the bottom of a ravine, on Saturday, wearing "Friday"s panties? But the person REALLY got pushed over the edge on the previous Monday! If the investigators believe the body has only been there since the previous day, they're NOT going to catch the perpetrator! He's already had five days to get away! Do you see how this could become a huge problem, putting day names on panties?
WHOSE STUPID IDEA WAS THIS, ANYWAY??
If this should ever come to a vote in your area, I hope you will consider what I've said and vote sensibly!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Saturday, September 4, 2010
"Leave Well Enough Alone"
Those words have become my new "mantra". I find myself saying that to myself many times a day now. I am somewhat of a "perfectionist", I guess, and in the past, would always 'keep at' something until I felt it to be as near perfect as I could get it....whether it be makeup, hair, artwork, housekeeping, or whatever. Many times....especially with HAIR, I would do more harm than good by continuing to 'mess' with it, trying to get that last hair in just exactly the right place. (know what I mean??) Because I had to 'tweak' that one last strand, I screwed up the entire "do", and had to start over. VERY time consuming when you're in a hurry! Maybe it's an attitude that you acquire with age. I am getting to where "good enough" is FINE with me. I no longer seem to be compelled to PERFECTION. Life is so much easier these days! I have learned that, in the grand scheme of things, it really is OK to be less than perfect. It is OK....just to BE. No pressure...no deadlines...no stress. I'm liking this stage of my life. It's enlightening! I'm also leaning toward that freedom that comes when I can finally convince myself to stop wearing makeup. How exhillarating THAT is going to be!! I haven't quite gotten there YET. I remain 'makeup free' on weekends, whenever possible, but am looking forward to the day when I can just wash my face & go. Too bad I didn't inherit my mother's beauty & perfect complexion. I'm at an age now where I find it amusing to observe young girls who just can't wait to wear makeup....because I know they will be where I'm at someday.....they, too, will look forward to the sheer luxury of wearing NONE. Yes....it really is wonderful to experience the freedom of simplicity! And while you're at it......just leave "well enough" ALONE!!
Sunday, June 20, 2010
"FAMILY" defined....
According to The American Heritage Dictionary ...family is defined as such:
fam·i·ly (fămə-lē, fămlē) n. pl. fam·i·lies
1. a. A fundamental social group in society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children.
b. Two or more people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another, and reside usually in the same dwelling place.
2. All the members of a household under one roof.
Now consider, if you will, MY definintion of "family".
You may be related by blood, to other human beings, but this is attributable to an "accident of birth", and certainly not by any conscious effort on your part. An accident of birth does NOT necessarily create a "family". (Look at the fatherless children in your own community; look at the mothers who neglect and abuse their children....you call THAT "family"??)
I consider my family to consist of several people, both blood, and non-blood related, individuals. The non-blood family members are sometimes held in higher regard, because I actually CHOSE them to be part of my "family". This is a distinction that is not given lightly! These members had to EARN my respect and high regard. These members were chosen because they have proven, on countless occasions, that they have MY bests interest at heart. There is never a hidden agenda or a self-serving "act" of generosity.
Then, on the other hand....I have "blood relatives" that I refuse to allow to cross my threshhold. These individuals cannot be trusted. THEY have proven, time and time again, that they are only out for themselves. They have no regard for me, or my possessions. They take what they want, when they want, and have no concern for how the loss will affect ME, financially or emotionally. The fact that I took these individuals into my home in times past, and gave generously of my time, attention, and money in an attempt to help improve THEIR current situation, obviously meant nothing to them. I am a kind-hearted person, and apparently, because of this, I was simply an easy 'mark'. Don't make the mistake of confusing my kind heartedness with weakness! I was made a fool of; I was used; I was cheated; and I was lied to.....repeatedly. WHY WOULD I STILL CONSIDER THESE INDIVIDUALS "FAMILY" ????? Please refer back to section 1., part b. of the above definition: "people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another" I do NOT share goals or values with liars, theives, and cheats, therefore, I do not consider these types of persons my "family", regardless of bloodlines and DNA! And by the time I cut you out of MY family, my "long term commitment" to you has already been abused and exhausted! I am a christian. I believe that we are to forgive others. Even Jesus said that we are to "turn the other cheek".........but He never said what to do AFTER we have turned the other cheek! I forgive those who have wronged me in the past, but I am NOT duty-bound, by blood OR christianity, to allow them to CONTINUE misusing me!
In the Bible, Luke 18:22, Jesus tells us we are to forgive others "...until seventy times seven." So, being a christian, I will continue to forgive you for being a dumbass and constantly making bad choices & decisions for your life...I will forgive you these things...but I will NOT allow you to continue making ME the target of your transgressions. YOU are not my "family"...you were simply an accident of birth. Just as I can choose who I want to allow INTO my family.....I can also choose who I will NOT allow.
If this offends you....it is probably because you spend way too much time dwelling on what you perceive as your "rights" and "privileges"! The ONLY "birthright" you have is the promise of salvation by God. There is no other. I suggest to you, to get your head out of your ass and become a better person. Perhaps then, not only will the family you were BORN into accept you back into the fold, but you may find new "families" CHOOSING to make you a member, simply because you enhance their lives.
And if my words STILL offend you......GET OVER IT!!
fam·i·ly (fămə-lē, fămlē) n. pl. fam·i·lies
1. a. A fundamental social group in society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children.
b. Two or more people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another, and reside usually in the same dwelling place.
2. All the members of a household under one roof.
Now consider, if you will, MY definintion of "family".
You may be related by blood, to other human beings, but this is attributable to an "accident of birth", and certainly not by any conscious effort on your part. An accident of birth does NOT necessarily create a "family". (Look at the fatherless children in your own community; look at the mothers who neglect and abuse their children....you call THAT "family"??)
I consider my family to consist of several people, both blood, and non-blood related, individuals. The non-blood family members are sometimes held in higher regard, because I actually CHOSE them to be part of my "family". This is a distinction that is not given lightly! These members had to EARN my respect and high regard. These members were chosen because they have proven, on countless occasions, that they have MY bests interest at heart. There is never a hidden agenda or a self-serving "act" of generosity.
Then, on the other hand....I have "blood relatives" that I refuse to allow to cross my threshhold. These individuals cannot be trusted. THEY have proven, time and time again, that they are only out for themselves. They have no regard for me, or my possessions. They take what they want, when they want, and have no concern for how the loss will affect ME, financially or emotionally. The fact that I took these individuals into my home in times past, and gave generously of my time, attention, and money in an attempt to help improve THEIR current situation, obviously meant nothing to them. I am a kind-hearted person, and apparently, because of this, I was simply an easy 'mark'. Don't make the mistake of confusing my kind heartedness with weakness! I was made a fool of; I was used; I was cheated; and I was lied to.....repeatedly. WHY WOULD I STILL CONSIDER THESE INDIVIDUALS "FAMILY" ????? Please refer back to section 1., part b. of the above definition: "people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another" I do NOT share goals or values with liars, theives, and cheats, therefore, I do not consider these types of persons my "family", regardless of bloodlines and DNA! And by the time I cut you out of MY family, my "long term commitment" to you has already been abused and exhausted! I am a christian. I believe that we are to forgive others. Even Jesus said that we are to "turn the other cheek".........but He never said what to do AFTER we have turned the other cheek! I forgive those who have wronged me in the past, but I am NOT duty-bound, by blood OR christianity, to allow them to CONTINUE misusing me!
In the Bible, Luke 18:22, Jesus tells us we are to forgive others "...until seventy times seven." So, being a christian, I will continue to forgive you for being a dumbass and constantly making bad choices & decisions for your life...I will forgive you these things...but I will NOT allow you to continue making ME the target of your transgressions. YOU are not my "family"...you were simply an accident of birth. Just as I can choose who I want to allow INTO my family.....I can also choose who I will NOT allow.
If this offends you....it is probably because you spend way too much time dwelling on what you perceive as your "rights" and "privileges"! The ONLY "birthright" you have is the promise of salvation by God. There is no other. I suggest to you, to get your head out of your ass and become a better person. Perhaps then, not only will the family you were BORN into accept you back into the fold, but you may find new "families" CHOOSING to make you a member, simply because you enhance their lives.
And if my words STILL offend you......GET OVER IT!!
Friday, June 11, 2010
PET PEEVES!!!!!!
We all have them.....but some of mine, (that I thought were dead), have suddenly been resurrected!! GR-R-R-R-R!!!!
I work for a real estate management company. My job involves answering the phones and re-routing calls to the appropriate persons. I take roughly 45-55 calls per day on average. Some of these calls are from the on-site managers of our apartment complexes (we have 38 of them) Other calls are from perspective renters inquiring about details and cost. Still other calls are from actual tenants, already ensconced in one of the properties my company owns and manages. We have several single-family dwellings which are occupied. At some point in time, throughout the month, I talk to most of these people.
I have spent many, many years working in corporate America. I EXPECT (silly me!!) a certain amount of courtesy, consideration, and INTELLIGENCE!! Guess I need to back up...regroup....and remind myself that I am no longer working in the metropolis of our state's capitol. I am now working in "Hillbillie Hollow". Most high school graduates in this neck of the woods can spell their own names, and know enough grammar to "get by". But PHONE ETIQUETTE is a FOREIGN LANGUAGE!!!!
With nearly every call I take, the caller immediately launches into his or her script without so much as even stating their names or in any way identifying themselves. I don't need to know that you've just received an eviction notice..."in error" (yeah, right!) and you want 'someone' to "get this straightened out" for you. First of all.....we don't issue eviction notices on the spur of the moment. You have to be seriously delinquent in your rent to get one! Secondly...it would be of tremendous help to know WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?? and which of our complexes is evicting you?? And even after I repeat, several times, that we only take complaints IN WRITING, they continue to give me every nasty detail of the transgressions against them! (totally unjust, you understand!)
Then there are those callers who begin their conversation with..."Um, yeah, uh.....I was callin' about the ad in the paper??" OK, WHICH AD? WHICH PAPER?? WHAT DOES THE AD SAY? We advertise in several newspapers across three states!! I am NOT clairvoyant!
Many of these callers are calling from their cell phones, while driving. They call to inquire about rental properties we may have available.......yet, when I tell them I need to direct them to another number for further details, they tell me, "oh, I'm driving and can't write that down". They tell me they'll just "remember" the number......then without fail, nearly every single one of them calls me back within just a couple of minutes to say..."what was that number again??" And not only that, but if you're looking for a place to live...don't you want to write down pertinent information, like How much per month is the rent?....is there a security deposit?....are pets accepted, ect.?? They call to ask if we "have anything for rent"....but are in no way prepared to deal with whatever information I give them! Big wasted effort on MY part, as they will NOT be able to remember all the details, and can't write it down while driving. So, if you have to use your cell phone and make these important calls while driving........PULL OVER!!!!!!!!!! Spare the other drivers on the road your erratic driving!
And don't you just LOVE those automated calls that, once you've answered & identified your company and yourself.....you hear "Please hold for an important message" ....WTF?? I have more pressing business to attend to and have no intention of 'holding' for your crap!! If it were REALLY IMPORTANT....you would have put a HUMAN on the phone to make that call to begin with!!!
Oh, and you gotta love those callers who, upon my answering their call, they immediately shout, "George in?" Part of my job is to field calls....eliminating solicitors, cranks, and what not. George may actually BE IN THE OFFICE.....but you won't know that until I can tell George WHO YOU ARE and WHAT YOU WANT. George doesn't like "blind transferred" calls. I don't blame him. If you're just trying to sell us toner for our copier......WE DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!
I especially like the calls that I KNOW are solicitors, simply because they ask for my boss, by name, but refer to her as "MR." She has one of those trans-gender names that works well for EITHER sex....but if you don't KNOW her, you don't know she's a female. When I tell them that MR. xxxxx is not in, and ask if I can take a msg., they refuse, insisting that they will just call back another time. GUESS WHAT?? You aren't going to reach her THEN, either! You STILL have to go thru me, and I'm onto you!
(OMG!! I HAVE BECOME ONE OF THE PEOPLE OF POWER!!!!)
You'll have to read my previous post "People Of Power" to appreciate this fact!
I work for a real estate management company. My job involves answering the phones and re-routing calls to the appropriate persons. I take roughly 45-55 calls per day on average. Some of these calls are from the on-site managers of our apartment complexes (we have 38 of them) Other calls are from perspective renters inquiring about details and cost. Still other calls are from actual tenants, already ensconced in one of the properties my company owns and manages. We have several single-family dwellings which are occupied. At some point in time, throughout the month, I talk to most of these people.
I have spent many, many years working in corporate America. I EXPECT (silly me!!) a certain amount of courtesy, consideration, and INTELLIGENCE!! Guess I need to back up...regroup....and remind myself that I am no longer working in the metropolis of our state's capitol. I am now working in "Hillbillie Hollow". Most high school graduates in this neck of the woods can spell their own names, and know enough grammar to "get by". But PHONE ETIQUETTE is a FOREIGN LANGUAGE!!!!
With nearly every call I take, the caller immediately launches into his or her script without so much as even stating their names or in any way identifying themselves. I don't need to know that you've just received an eviction notice..."in error" (yeah, right!) and you want 'someone' to "get this straightened out" for you. First of all.....we don't issue eviction notices on the spur of the moment. You have to be seriously delinquent in your rent to get one! Secondly...it would be of tremendous help to know WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?? and which of our complexes is evicting you?? And even after I repeat, several times, that we only take complaints IN WRITING, they continue to give me every nasty detail of the transgressions against them! (totally unjust, you understand!)
Then there are those callers who begin their conversation with..."Um, yeah, uh.....I was callin' about the ad in the paper??" OK, WHICH AD? WHICH PAPER?? WHAT DOES THE AD SAY? We advertise in several newspapers across three states!! I am NOT clairvoyant!
Many of these callers are calling from their cell phones, while driving. They call to inquire about rental properties we may have available.......yet, when I tell them I need to direct them to another number for further details, they tell me, "oh, I'm driving and can't write that down". They tell me they'll just "remember" the number......then without fail, nearly every single one of them calls me back within just a couple of minutes to say..."what was that number again??" And not only that, but if you're looking for a place to live...don't you want to write down pertinent information, like How much per month is the rent?....is there a security deposit?....are pets accepted, ect.?? They call to ask if we "have anything for rent"....but are in no way prepared to deal with whatever information I give them! Big wasted effort on MY part, as they will NOT be able to remember all the details, and can't write it down while driving. So, if you have to use your cell phone and make these important calls while driving........PULL OVER!!!!!!!!!! Spare the other drivers on the road your erratic driving!
And don't you just LOVE those automated calls that, once you've answered & identified your company and yourself.....you hear "Please hold for an important message" ....WTF?? I have more pressing business to attend to and have no intention of 'holding' for your crap!! If it were REALLY IMPORTANT....you would have put a HUMAN on the phone to make that call to begin with!!!
Oh, and you gotta love those callers who, upon my answering their call, they immediately shout, "George in?" Part of my job is to field calls....eliminating solicitors, cranks, and what not. George may actually BE IN THE OFFICE.....but you won't know that until I can tell George WHO YOU ARE and WHAT YOU WANT. George doesn't like "blind transferred" calls. I don't blame him. If you're just trying to sell us toner for our copier......WE DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!
I especially like the calls that I KNOW are solicitors, simply because they ask for my boss, by name, but refer to her as "MR." She has one of those trans-gender names that works well for EITHER sex....but if you don't KNOW her, you don't know she's a female. When I tell them that MR. xxxxx is not in, and ask if I can take a msg., they refuse, insisting that they will just call back another time. GUESS WHAT?? You aren't going to reach her THEN, either! You STILL have to go thru me, and I'm onto you!
(OMG!! I HAVE BECOME ONE OF THE PEOPLE OF POWER!!!!)
You'll have to read my previous post "People Of Power" to appreciate this fact!
Monday, May 31, 2010
A Roo With A 'Tude!!
OK....it's a holiday...I don't have to get up at 5am.....I like to sleep in on weekends....I don't really consider 7:00am LATE, when we're talking "sleeping in", but apparently KELLOGG (photo at right) was PO'd! He didn't get out of the coop at the expected early hour that he has become accustomed to! OMG....it was all of 8:15 am when I went to the barn to open the coop for the day. AND DID I SEE ANY GRATITUDE???? NO-O-O-O-O!!!!! The little bastard attacked me! And NOT just once! I noticed him get that "look" in his eye....like Buddy used to.....and KNEW he was psyching himself up to get me. I had stopped bringing my walkin' stick with me after Buddy left, thinking I would no longer need it! Boy, was I wrong! Just like Buddy, Kellogg tried to use the "sneak up from behind" method....but I'm wise to that trick. I saw him coming & turned just in time to land a good solid kick to his chest. Didn't phase him.....rubber boots don't pack much of a whollop, ya know? I knew there was a heavy hoe handle up at the barn entrance (that was a good 200 ft away!) so as I headed back to get it, Kellogg stalked me the entire trip....displaying threatening postures & mumbling chicken curse words under his breath. Once I reached the hoe handle & started back, the fight was on!! He came at me with a vengeance...feathers all puffed out & spurs a shinin'. I used the hoe handle to ward him off. Poked him in the chest with it, each time he came at me. I think he must've called some sort of truce, as he finally wandered off. I was relieved that I didn't really have to HURT him....and that he hadn't actually hurt ME. I then went outside into the yard to see if all the babies had made it out....DANGED IF HE DIDN'T COME AT ME AGAIN! This time, I truly think he was out for blood. We went three rounds. I walked away the champion....this time! I think he now knows that I mean business & will NOT tolerate this sort of treatment from him....or any OTHER rooster! I also think he is the vindictive type. He was rather humiliated to lose three rounds in front of all the girls....and oh, they were all watching intently! Especially when I turned that hoe handle into a baseball bat and dared him to try one more time!
I'm really shocked and surprised that Kellogg would treat me this way. I have been nothing but NICE to him.....giving him preferential treatment and choosing HIM to be the "keeper" when I found new homes for the other 4 roosters. I have to go back to the barn this evening to close the coop. This time, I'll be ready for him if he tries it again. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. The whole time he was in "attack mode" this morning, he was putting himself between me and the hens. Maybe he's become just a little TOO overprotective where they are concerned. Or, maybe my bright hot pink shirt, denim capris, sunshades & 'updo' disturbed him. Maybe he didn't recognize me.....or maybe he doesn't like hot pink! Either way.....I may just change clothes before my evening trip to the barn. If he attacks again, I'll know it had nothing to do with my outfit....and everything to to with his ATTITUDE! Guess I'll have to clue him in that I don't HAVE to have a rooster in order to enjoy my chickens.....and still have eggs! He may have convinced himself that he is indispensable. He's in for a very rude awakening, if that's the case!
Saturday, May 29, 2010
"Coppertone" Chicks
OMG! Just when you think you've solved all the immediate problems for the Coop Community residents! Well.......NOW I know why so many of "the girls" are lounging INSIDE the barn, even on a beautifully glorious sun-shiny day!! SUNBURN!!!!!! Yep, you heard right! Who'da'thunk it??
If you've been following the chickens saga......you'll know that many of my girls were missing feathers, due to the brutal treatments by the excess of roosters. Their feathers are FINALLY beginning to grow in again, but many of them still have very large bare spots. (see photo at right) This is Ophelia. She is one of several with embarrassing baldness. You'll see, she has quite a large unfeathered area! Now imagine it beet red and sunburned!!
What am I to do?? If I opt for sunscreen, which brand?? If I use a tropical smelling coconut-ty one, will she smell like FOOD and get eaten by the others?? Will this sweet smelling sunscreen attract gnats, flies, and such, which would be a HUGE annoyance to her?? Not to mention that the other hens would inadvertantly peck HER, while trying to get the flies & gnats! WTD? WTD? Should I get oil or lotion?? Maybe I could use the spray on type. That might be easier than wrestling her into a squat position, long enough to get the oil or lotion actually rubbed on. Yeah, I think spray will be the better option. OR......
Maybe I could make little chicken cabanas and cute little brightly colored, individual roosts to sit under little umbrellas!! Instead of a Dos Equis logo, we could use a Chicken Feed logo. We could feature a mariachi band on weekends. Heck, I could probably set up these little umbrella covered roosts over by the horse puddle (yeah, the horses dug it themselves so they could wallow in it on hot days!) Kinda make it a little chicken Oasis! It would give the girls the shade they need, while still allowing them to be outdoors without the fear of sunburn. And I think perhaps some live entertainment might be just the thing to take their minds off their burned butts!!
What am I to do?? If I opt for sunscreen, which brand?? If I use a tropical smelling coconut-ty one, will she smell like FOOD and get eaten by the others?? Will this sweet smelling sunscreen attract gnats, flies, and such, which would be a HUGE annoyance to her?? Not to mention that the other hens would inadvertantly peck HER, while trying to get the flies & gnats! WTD? WTD? Should I get oil or lotion?? Maybe I could use the spray on type. That might be easier than wrestling her into a squat position, long enough to get the oil or lotion actually rubbed on. Yeah, I think spray will be the better option. OR......
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Saturday, May 22, 2010
People of Power
Bet you thought this post was gonna be about politicians, law enforcement officers, the very rich and such, didn't ya? Well, you're about to learn that these are not the ONLY entities who hold positions of power. I'm here to give you MY views about People of Power.
1) Consider....you're at a public event, such as a concert or festival. The only bathroom facilities are those wretched port-a-potties!! There are about 10 people in line ahead of YOU, but the line is just as long at all the other port-a-potties, so you may as well just cross your legs & HOPE you don't pee yourself before it's your turn. The person CURRENTLY occupying the out house is IN CONTROL! That person has the ability to make your wait longer & more uncomfortable than it should be. You're helpless to "hurry" this person along. THEY ARE IN CONTROL. They are... one of the People of Power !
2) It's lunch time. You only get an hour to wolf down a greasy burger and fries before you have to fight traffic to get back to your six foot by six foot cubicle you call your "office". The burger joint is only a couple of blocks from the office so you feel you have plenty of time, even considering traffic. What you did NOT plan on, were things getting "hosed up" in the drive thru lane!! After moving at speeds not exceeding .0004 mph, it's FINALLY your turn at the speaker.
NO!! I DO NOT WANT ONE OF YOUR DELICIOUS, DOUBLE- ICED,TRIPLE- CHOCOLATE, LUCIOUS- LATTE, FREAKIN'- FRAPPE WHATEVERS!!!! I just want to place my damned order!!!!!!
(The marketing guy who invented "suggestive selling" needs to be taken out and shot, if he is still alive!!!!) Your menu is not that extensive! My selection of food items was made, long before I even GOT to your place of business!!!
You place your order and have to repeat it three times before the bimbo finally gets it right. You are advised of your total and told to advance to the "first window, please". Here, (PLEASE HAVE YOUR MONEY READY) they collect your money for your order. THIS is where they get you by the short hairs, folks!! NOW...you're stuck. Trapped. They've got your money, and they've still got your food until you can advance to the next window. You've now been sitting in line... between the first & second windows... for approximately 20 of your 60 minutes alloted for lunch. You decide..."SCREW IT! I'll forfeit my $5.51 and just go somewhere else for lunch!!" WRONG!! See previous comments! You're stuck!! The cars in front of & behind you are so close that there is no way you can maneuver your vehicle out of the line and leave. The bimbo at the second window is steadily passing bags, napkins, straws, & styrofoam cups thru the little window to those in line ahead of you. The line is inching forward. You MIGHT have a chance at finally getting your food with a 15 min. timespan left to EAT IT before returning to work!
Your turn has finally arrived at the second window. Bimbo passes you the drink you didn't order, but you don't have time to argue with her. She passes you all the condiments you really don't need OR want, (completely ignoring their own sign of CONDIMENTS PROVIDED UPON REQUEST)....and THEN....she asks if you'll please pull over to the BLUE parking slot & wait for the remainder of your order to be brought out to you. Seems your burger is still on the grill & just not quite ready to be wrapped, bagged, and passed thru the little window. Your blood pressure is rising, along with your temper; both to dangerous highs. Defeated, you pull over to the area designated, and are resigned to WAIT. They still have your money, and half of your order, and it's too late to go anywhere else for lunch! You may think she looks like a teenage bimbo.....but in fact, she is... one of the People of Power!
3) It's late at night, and raining hard. You've had a sh*t day...you're tired...and all you want to do is GET HOME. You're in the middle of BFE on a winding two lane road which is 45 miles of DO NOT PASS! zones. The speed limit signs say 55 mph. Understandably, most motorists slow down some when driving under adverse conditions. You can deal with....and even appreciate....this. You're whizzing along at 50 mph when a car on a side road, a half mile up the highway, decides to pull out in front of you. FORGET that there is nothing behind you for a ka-zillion miles!!! This inconsiderate *sshole pulls out in front of you without regard to your vehicle's size, mass, or HIS angle of trajectory, should you actually HIT HIM at this speed.
You instantly hit your brakes, all the while cursing him for his stupidity!! Maybe, if you weren't so tired, it wouldn't piss you off so bad, but hey! You can't be sweetness & light ALL THE TIME!!!
You have suddenly dropped from 50 mph to 20. Ok. Let's give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Let's reason that, he just pulled out into traffic.....it's raining.....it's gonna take him a mile or so to get up to speed. Five miles later, we're still fluctuating between 25 and 40 mph. Gramps can't seem to get his vehicle on a constant speed and KEEP IT THERE. There is NO place to pass him. You've even considered passing him on the RIGHT, hoping you wouldn't get caught.....but just can't make yourself take that sort of risk. Gramps is oblivious to you flashing your lights behind him & honking your horn repeatedly. He doesn't need the glasses or the hearing aids you're screaming about, to know you're back there. He KNOWS you're back there....and he also knows there ain't a dang thing you can do about it......he is one of the People of Power!
4) You're at the gas pump with intentions of filling your vehicle's gas tank on your way to work. It's a busy day at the pumps & people are jockying for a spot for their chance to take advantage of the $2.35 gal. price. The guy at the pump just ahead of you has just completed pumping....replaced the nozzle on the pump....and now has to go to the cashier to pay for his gas. DOES HE MOVE HIS VEHICLE AWAY FROM THE PUMP SO YOU CAN GET GAS?????? NO-O-O-O-O-O!!!!!!! He is.....one of the People of Power!
But...
SOMEDAY....YOU will be the one occupying the port-a-potty!!
SOMEDAY....YOU WILL REFUSE to pull over to the Blue parking slot & wait like a speechless, spineless drone!
SOMEDAY.....you'll still be next in line at the pump, but you will have a brand new, shiny Zippo lighter, and an M-80 to slip into his tank's fill spout while he shuffles off to pay for his gasoline!
SOMEDAY......YOU will finally become.....
....one of the People of Power!!
1) Consider....you're at a public event, such as a concert or festival. The only bathroom facilities are those wretched port-a-potties!! There are about 10 people in line ahead of YOU, but the line is just as long at all the other port-a-potties, so you may as well just cross your legs & HOPE you don't pee yourself before it's your turn. The person CURRENTLY occupying the out house is IN CONTROL! That person has the ability to make your wait longer & more uncomfortable than it should be. You're helpless to "hurry" this person along. THEY ARE IN CONTROL. They are... one of the People of Power !
2) It's lunch time. You only get an hour to wolf down a greasy burger and fries before you have to fight traffic to get back to your six foot by six foot cubicle you call your "office". The burger joint is only a couple of blocks from the office so you feel you have plenty of time, even considering traffic. What you did NOT plan on, were things getting "hosed up" in the drive thru lane!! After moving at speeds not exceeding .0004 mph, it's FINALLY your turn at the speaker.
NO!! I DO NOT WANT ONE OF YOUR DELICIOUS, DOUBLE- ICED,TRIPLE- CHOCOLATE, LUCIOUS- LATTE, FREAKIN'- FRAPPE WHATEVERS!!!! I just want to place my damned order!!!!!!
(The marketing guy who invented "suggestive selling" needs to be taken out and shot, if he is still alive!!!!) Your menu is not that extensive! My selection of food items was made, long before I even GOT to your place of business!!!
You place your order and have to repeat it three times before the bimbo finally gets it right. You are advised of your total and told to advance to the "first window, please". Here, (PLEASE HAVE YOUR MONEY READY) they collect your money for your order. THIS is where they get you by the short hairs, folks!! NOW...you're stuck. Trapped. They've got your money, and they've still got your food until you can advance to the next window. You've now been sitting in line... between the first & second windows... for approximately 20 of your 60 minutes alloted for lunch. You decide..."SCREW IT! I'll forfeit my $5.51 and just go somewhere else for lunch!!" WRONG!! See previous comments! You're stuck!! The cars in front of & behind you are so close that there is no way you can maneuver your vehicle out of the line and leave. The bimbo at the second window is steadily passing bags, napkins, straws, & styrofoam cups thru the little window to those in line ahead of you. The line is inching forward. You MIGHT have a chance at finally getting your food with a 15 min. timespan left to EAT IT before returning to work!
Your turn has finally arrived at the second window. Bimbo passes you the drink you didn't order, but you don't have time to argue with her. She passes you all the condiments you really don't need OR want, (completely ignoring their own sign of CONDIMENTS PROVIDED UPON REQUEST)....and THEN....she asks if you'll please pull over to the BLUE parking slot & wait for the remainder of your order to be brought out to you. Seems your burger is still on the grill & just not quite ready to be wrapped, bagged, and passed thru the little window. Your blood pressure is rising, along with your temper; both to dangerous highs. Defeated, you pull over to the area designated, and are resigned to WAIT. They still have your money, and half of your order, and it's too late to go anywhere else for lunch! You may think she looks like a teenage bimbo.....but in fact, she is... one of the People of Power!
3) It's late at night, and raining hard. You've had a sh*t day...you're tired...and all you want to do is GET HOME. You're in the middle of BFE on a winding two lane road which is 45 miles of DO NOT PASS! zones. The speed limit signs say 55 mph. Understandably, most motorists slow down some when driving under adverse conditions. You can deal with....and even appreciate....this. You're whizzing along at 50 mph when a car on a side road, a half mile up the highway, decides to pull out in front of you. FORGET that there is nothing behind you for a ka-zillion miles!!! This inconsiderate *sshole pulls out in front of you without regard to your vehicle's size, mass, or HIS angle of trajectory, should you actually HIT HIM at this speed.
You instantly hit your brakes, all the while cursing him for his stupidity!! Maybe, if you weren't so tired, it wouldn't piss you off so bad, but hey! You can't be sweetness & light ALL THE TIME!!!
You have suddenly dropped from 50 mph to 20. Ok. Let's give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Let's reason that, he just pulled out into traffic.....it's raining.....it's gonna take him a mile or so to get up to speed. Five miles later, we're still fluctuating between 25 and 40 mph. Gramps can't seem to get his vehicle on a constant speed and KEEP IT THERE. There is NO place to pass him. You've even considered passing him on the RIGHT, hoping you wouldn't get caught.....but just can't make yourself take that sort of risk. Gramps is oblivious to you flashing your lights behind him & honking your horn repeatedly. He doesn't need the glasses or the hearing aids you're screaming about, to know you're back there. He KNOWS you're back there....and he also knows there ain't a dang thing you can do about it......he is one of the People of Power!
4) You're at the gas pump with intentions of filling your vehicle's gas tank on your way to work. It's a busy day at the pumps & people are jockying for a spot for their chance to take advantage of the $2.35 gal. price. The guy at the pump just ahead of you has just completed pumping....replaced the nozzle on the pump....and now has to go to the cashier to pay for his gas. DOES HE MOVE HIS VEHICLE AWAY FROM THE PUMP SO YOU CAN GET GAS?????? NO-O-O-O-O-O!!!!!!! He is.....one of the People of Power!
But...
SOMEDAY....YOU will be the one occupying the port-a-potty!!
SOMEDAY....YOU WILL REFUSE to pull over to the Blue parking slot & wait like a speechless, spineless drone!
SOMEDAY.....you'll still be next in line at the pump, but you will have a brand new, shiny Zippo lighter, and an M-80 to slip into his tank's fill spout while he shuffles off to pay for his gasoline!
SOMEDAY......YOU will finally become.....
....one of the People of Power!!
Of Meat and Potatoes.....
I am carnivorous. I LOVE MEAT.....beef, pork, chicken, turkey, fish, crawfish, snails, shrimp....well, you get my drift. I've been eating meat all my life. I love my steaks rare. I love my chicken fried (like mama used to make it!) I love many varieties of fish....fixed a variety of ways. And now....SUDDENLY....it occurs to me that.....I've been eating CREATURES. How hypocritical of me...NOW...to still want to eat chicken....as long as I didn't raise it, and don't have to kill them. If TYSON does the deed......I'll buy the frozen, fully cooked fajita chicken stips to add to my salad & pig out! Speaking of pigs....I never met anything PORK I didn't like! (good thing I'm not Jewish!) I've even gone so far as to HEAR THE CRAWFISH SCREAM upon being dunked ALIVE in boiling water......and I eat them with gusto! HOW BARBARIC!!!!
These thoughts did not come to me simply because I am now raising chickens. These thoughts came to me as I was preparing a fresh salad, consisting of lettuce, celery, onions, radishes, carrots, etc. I thought: How cool is this to eat a PLANT that grew out of the ground?? As I was preparing the salad, and communing with the vegetables, I began thinking of all the animals on earth that also eat from the bounty of the earth. I am living in the country...surrounded by horses, chickens, ducks, geese, birds of many, many varieties....and the one thing in common is: THEY ALL EAT FROM WHAT GOD PLANTED IN THE EARTH!
Then....oh, THEN.....the "preacher's daughter" in me appeared. I remember the Bible lessons taught to me all my life...how, in the beginning....the VERY beginning.....in the Garden of Eden....EVERY CREATURE ate from the bounty of the garden! There were no carnivores!!! The lion really COULD lie down with the lamb....because the lamb didn't look like a meal!! DO YOU GET WHAT I'M SAYIN'??? God put enough plants, grasses, etc. on this earth to FEED EVERY CREATURE. That includes you and me!
It wasn't until Eve listened to the serpent (Satan) and ate from the ONE tree God had forbidden them, that blood was shed. Can you imagine......the enormous bounty of fruits and vegetables that must have been available to Adam & Eve??? I'm sure it would have shamed the buffet at Western Sizzler or even Golden Corral!! (and let's don't even get into the "Eve gave to Adam" thing. HE HAD FREE WILL and made his own choice to eat of the forbidden fruit, just like she did!) SIDEBAR: Do you see that this "it wasn't my fault" crap had it's origins in the beginning of time??! And also....just for the record....the Bible NEVER states what type of "fruit" was on the forbidden tree. Somewhere along the way, we humans decided it was an apple. Go figure!
Anyway, once Adam & Eve sinned & tried to cover their nakedness with fig leaves (apparently it didn't work so well), God had to kill an animal to provide them with hides/furs to cover themselves. Guess once THAT deed was done, God didn't want the meat to go to waste.......something or someone had to eat it. THIS is when carnivores came to be. Imagine how God must've felt having to KILL one of his beautiful animals because Adam & Eve screwed up! (I wonder if vultures were then created to help with the "clean up" of dead animals?? Until this point, there would have been no real need for their existence....except maybe to eat dead PLANTS??)
Oh, but I am really getting off track here. I did not intend this post to turn into a sermon! I simply meant to convey how my thought processes are constantly changing! I can hardly look an animal in the eye, now, knowing I am EATING their relatives! Maybe I should determine that, going forward, I will NOT eat anything that has eyes!?
Oh, but wait a minute! POTATOES HAVE EYES!!
(But, they don't have "feelings"....do they??) :-{
These thoughts did not come to me simply because I am now raising chickens. These thoughts came to me as I was preparing a fresh salad, consisting of lettuce, celery, onions, radishes, carrots, etc. I thought: How cool is this to eat a PLANT that grew out of the ground?? As I was preparing the salad, and communing with the vegetables, I began thinking of all the animals on earth that also eat from the bounty of the earth. I am living in the country...surrounded by horses, chickens, ducks, geese, birds of many, many varieties....and the one thing in common is: THEY ALL EAT FROM WHAT GOD PLANTED IN THE EARTH!
Then....oh, THEN.....the "preacher's daughter" in me appeared. I remember the Bible lessons taught to me all my life...how, in the beginning....the VERY beginning.....in the Garden of Eden....EVERY CREATURE ate from the bounty of the garden! There were no carnivores!!! The lion really COULD lie down with the lamb....because the lamb didn't look like a meal!! DO YOU GET WHAT I'M SAYIN'??? God put enough plants, grasses, etc. on this earth to FEED EVERY CREATURE. That includes you and me!
It wasn't until Eve listened to the serpent (Satan) and ate from the ONE tree God had forbidden them, that blood was shed. Can you imagine......the enormous bounty of fruits and vegetables that must have been available to Adam & Eve??? I'm sure it would have shamed the buffet at Western Sizzler or even Golden Corral!! (and let's don't even get into the "Eve gave to Adam" thing. HE HAD FREE WILL and made his own choice to eat of the forbidden fruit, just like she did!) SIDEBAR: Do you see that this "it wasn't my fault" crap had it's origins in the beginning of time??! And also....just for the record....the Bible NEVER states what type of "fruit" was on the forbidden tree. Somewhere along the way, we humans decided it was an apple. Go figure!
Anyway, once Adam & Eve sinned & tried to cover their nakedness with fig leaves (apparently it didn't work so well), God had to kill an animal to provide them with hides/furs to cover themselves. Guess once THAT deed was done, God didn't want the meat to go to waste.......something or someone had to eat it. THIS is when carnivores came to be. Imagine how God must've felt having to KILL one of his beautiful animals because Adam & Eve screwed up! (I wonder if vultures were then created to help with the "clean up" of dead animals?? Until this point, there would have been no real need for their existence....except maybe to eat dead PLANTS??)
Oh, but I am really getting off track here. I did not intend this post to turn into a sermon! I simply meant to convey how my thought processes are constantly changing! I can hardly look an animal in the eye, now, knowing I am EATING their relatives! Maybe I should determine that, going forward, I will NOT eat anything that has eyes!?
Oh, but wait a minute! POTATOES HAVE EYES!!
(But, they don't have "feelings"....do they??) :-{
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Braggin' Rights!!
I received the below msg. in an email this week! I must say, I was quite surprised & especially PROUD to have won FIRST PLACE in a Limmerick Contest!!
Hi "Stella",
Congratulations on winning the April Limerick Challenge.
http://writeononline.com/2010/05/10/write-on-online-aprl-challenge-winners/
I will forward your email address to iScript, so they can send you info on your prize.
Thanks for entering. Best of luck on your projects!
Deb
HERE IS MY WINNING ENTRY!
There was a wee man, name of Evans
Whose lottery card was all sevens.
On the night of the draw
It stuck in his craw
That the jackpot was had with ELEVENS!
YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi "Stella",
Congratulations on winning the April Limerick Challenge.
http://writeononline.com/2010/05/10/write-on-online-aprl-challenge-winners/
I will forward your email address to iScript, so they can send you info on your prize.
Thanks for entering. Best of luck on your projects!
Deb
HERE IS MY WINNING ENTRY!
There was a wee man, name of Evans
Whose lottery card was all sevens.
On the night of the draw
It stuck in his craw
That the jackpot was had with ELEVENS!
YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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